Volcanic

and i’m scared for tomorrow and for what it will bring

what king of new place, what kind of new things?

will it be better, it might be worse

i might smile and i might just curse

but the next day will still happen, i’ll let it be

because tomorrow, the day will roll right past me

Blue flower in a yellow field,

Guard yourself with a flimsy shield.

Words like nails under the skin,

Fighting a battle you’ll never win.

Controversial written on your face.

You won’t stop, but you have no pace.

sugar rush baby i’m high on your sweet talk

i wanna grab you, stop, you just walk

the words spilling from your lips drown me in a sea

but you sail right past ‘cause you were never talking to me

I find myself writing silly lines about a love,

That either doesn’t exist, or is disposed of,

And poems about this lover,

Who I will never discover,

And I start to believe that it’s real,

Because I have no feelings to feel.

line after line

i’m slipping down

wine after wine

i’ll sink then drown

relentless beating

who’s fault is this

capricious heating

come back, bliss

give me a reason

give me another season

a colder one

without a sun

match my aura

selfish pandora

i can never be your flower

i can’t give up this power

i can never be your doll

but i can always be your fall

i can never give you the world

i can’t be open when i’m curled

but i’ll give you exactly what i can

for no other woman, no other man

I hate this town I live in and I hate being so young and I hate it with every breath coming out my right lung. Maybe it’s just teenage angst maybe it really is some kind of disorder, but I feel like there’s one side of wanting and it’s so haunting and I’m on the border. There’s really no way to go and no possible escape like there’s no scissors around to cut this restricting tape. So now the clock’s ticking and I’m just picking, off the days until I’m no longer a teenager. I still don’t understand why people always say, “It’s nice to be carefree, I’d love to stay that way”, because those people had friends, all I got is dead ends, and those people were clueless and a little viewless, but I’m just too jaded and my mind’s been so invaded and degraded to live in a city of the blind and the so unkind. And I’m not saying I know it all, quite the contrary, my mind’s still small. All I’m saying is I’m not happy and days go by I still feel crappy and I’m all out of hope and I want to leave so bad I can’t cope, with anything really, reality is starting to become distorted and all my dreams and goals seem thwarted. So tell me, my peer who happens to have the same birth date, how’s it like to be this age? I bet it feels utterly different, completely distant from the feeling of being stuck in a fucking cage.

i’d love to watch you fall

‘cause you usually just get it all

and now you get the cold and dark

all you ever do is growl and bark

If you had a choice to choose the world you live in, would you choose this one?

Frightened that perhaps in another world reality would be so undone?

Because here gravity efficiently pulls all down

And here you can be a fish, but you’ll drown

Maybe in your crammed head you can find a little extra space

To create another world, to conceive another kind of place

you look right past me

so i know we’ll never be

and you stand and leave when i sit

he says he won’t ever get it

but every time you turn away

it’s like a game and i wanna play

even when i get hurt

when i feel like dirt

Wake up and you’re gone

You always leave before dawn

Before I wake up to see

This mess you’ve left for me

And I do it all the time

All the same, another rhyme

I put it together in a one way street

I’m the tangled thing, this is my defeat

I just want it to be clean

‘cause you want me and I want you

But you’re just too mean

And all you say, never comes true

I was willing to look away for this

Thought maybe you wouldn’t lie

But there’s still no thing close to bliss

We both don’t see eye to eye

Out from your dirty mouth

You told her to stop making a fool out you

But she fled to the warm south

Because all the words you spoke were untrue

So now she lives down by the bay

Far from you, she had to get away

He was sweet and I was broken

Burning desires are always unspoken

But my limbs were torn

My skin, pricked by a thorn

Velvet formed from cotton

The fruit was never rotton

But then the pillars began to collapse

There were so many mazes, so many traps

And we jumped from the the castle into the sea

A love like this could never be